Hello beautiful readers, grab your wine! I want to begin this vent sesh with the following video:
Pretty intense right?
That video does a great job of showcasing the disparities between male and female domestic violence. It’s a prime example that people are much more apt to jump into action when a male is abusing a female, rather than when a female is abusing a male. Now why does this disparity exist? Regardless of the answer to that question, when push comes to shove (no pun intended), neither should be acceptable.
In today’s society, it’s fair to say that a woman abusing a male is glamorized in a way. You can frequently see a woman scorned slapping a man in romantic comedies, soap operas, reality TV shows, and the list goes on. These acts are so relevant in mainstream media, that most of us are probably desensitized to the fact that a human, is indeed hurting another human, when a woman gets aggressive with a man. It’s become a cultural norm.
I can 100% be grouped into the population that doesn’t find a female abusing a male to be a “jump into action” type of scenario. If I saw a guy slap a girl, I would get involved in that situation immediately. Like I’d be all over that like white on rice and would be calling the police instantaneously. But in occurrences where a gal hits a guy, the thoughts that run through my mind aren’t to call the police for help; my thoughts are more along the lines of, “Yikes lol! I wonder what he did?!”.
One of my past coworkers was in a relationship with a very spirited gal, who unfortunately would get aggressive when she drank. They would be out at a bar and if my coworker would say something off-tone, such as suggesting they go home, *Whapppp!*, he would get slapped. People at the bar would observe my coworker getting slapped, snicker a little, and then go back to their Moscow mules. Not only does this show we expect female abuse towards a male, it shows we find it amusing.
Let’s look at another situation shall we?
This is a story about Bobby, Lisa (Bobby’s on again, off again girlfriend), and Jennifer (Bobby’s on again, off again ex-girlfriend).
Now, some girls are crazy, some girls are really crazy, and some people's friends are assholes...comical assholes, but assholes just the same lol. Bobby and his friends were in college and decided to throw a party at their house (ahh the good ol’ house party days). Lisa of course would be in attendance, she was Bobby’s girlfriend.
Bobby's friends, being the pranksters that they were, decided to invite Jennifer, Bobby’s ex-girlfriend, to this party as well. What’s more fun than putting your buddy in an awkward situation am I right? Jennifer had stolen Bobby from Lisa twice before. As one can assume, Lisa and Jennifer didn’t get along. They were more or less each other's arch-nemesis’s in the college world.
The party was soon well underway; keg stands, flip cup, and beer pong were in full force. Bobby was having a blast until out of the corner of his eye, he caught a glimpse of Lisa laughing and high-fiving another girl. Who was Lisa chumming it up with? Oh dear lord, NO.
Bobby recognizes the girl with Lisa. It’s none other than his ex-girlfriend Jennifer (cue Bobby’s nightmares becoming a reality).
The pair catches Bobby looking their way and summon him with blazing stares. Bobby cautiously walks over, knowing that Lisa and Jennifer talking and high-fiving was probably not in his best interest.
The girls had come to the conclusion that their quarreling was Bobby’s doing; he had pitted them against one another to fight over him.
Upon this drunken “revelation”, Bobby, irritated with the accusation and both girls at this point, tells them to take a hike.
Bobby receives a full force slap from Jennifer. A stunned Bobby turns around to walk away from the angry ladies. Yes Jennifer had hit him, but he wasn’t going to get in a physical altercation with a woman. Bobby was taught like most of us that you are NEVER supposed to hit a girl.
While walking away,
Bobby receives a second blow to his ear. Bobby turns around to see who hit him this time; it was Lisa.
Lisa then proceeds to punch Bobby square in the face.
Completely stunned by what just happened, Bobby politely asks Lisa and Jennifer to leave the party.
My question is, why is it ok for a woman to abuse a man in this way? Am I saying Bobby should have thrown down with Lisa and Jennifer at the party? No lol. But this is just another example of women physically abusing a man in a public setting and getting away with it. Nobody at the party tried to stop Lisa or Jennifer. There was actually a lot of people laughing and a lot of “Yo bro, what’d you do to deserve that?” comments.
So what needs to change? Society shouldn’t condone the physical abuse of anyone. Why not step in and let someone know that hitting their significant other is not ok? No, this doesn’t mean you need to get into fisticuffs if you see a gal slap a guy lol, but there’s nothing wrong with chiming in and letting someone know there’s a more constructive way to resolve an issue than getting physical. Even the smallest verbal intervention can be a start!
& if you’re a female and ever feel the need to slap or hurt a male counterpart, please refrain. It’s trashy.
So have you ever been exposed to domestic violence where nothing was done? Definitely an interesting topic to mull over. I encourage you to help change the cultural norm!
Till next time!